I have been told that I have large expectations, some may even say unrealistic expectations. For myself, for others, for future events, basically everything. I prefer the term optimist but that probably does not cover it. So since I have such large hopes and predictions, I am often disappointed. And I have learned to live with it while at the same time trying to find a balance between realism and optimism.
Disappointment is a real bummer. That is the only way I can describe it, but I know you know the feeling. This week was one of those weeks that was a downer because my expectations did not match the outcome. I expected to come into the week and be the best counselor ever and my campers would be perfect darling angels because they thought I was super cool and that everything would go my way from the weather, to the meals. My week at my favorite place with my favorite people was anything but perfect. It ended on a low note and tears which is not ever how one should end a week ever and especially not at Camp. On top of that, there was this added feeling of disappointment; my mood sunk lower and lower.
As I was pulling out of the Camp gates I tried to consider what the Bible says about disappointments. What is the best way to handle them? Why do they happen? Was Jesus ever disappointed? I mean He was and is Perfect so are his expectations also spot on?
So anyways I did a quick Google search ( I would like to pretend I have the Bible memorized but I do not. I know you are probably thinking "oh I should just stop reading this blog now. She is no expert on much of anything". You may be right).
Big surprise (not really at all), the Bible is so very positive about overcoming disappointments because God is with you and me always. I liked this particular verse a lot:
I have read this verse man a time but my stubborn self needs reminders all the time. With disappointments I want to remind myself that everything will be ok. Campers fake crying because their bff is not right beside them is going to be ok. Not having an alternate option on the staff table on hotdog day even though I do not eat hotdogs, I will survive. Rain when I want sun, has some positive too. When I want to win and don't, even in a competition when everyone wins; sometimes trying is the point.
Camp is all about seeing the highlights in each activity and camper yet it is so hard to do the same when looking at my own personal experience. Even though my expectations were not met this week, I had many highlights like campers laughter after my goofy improvised activity and their excitement after my persistence for them to try something new. This week, I learned that the little outcomes and triumphs add up to cover my disappointment of a too large goal like a stitched together quilt covering a tired soul.